Long distance relationship games: 15 ideas that work on a phone

Games give a long distance call something better to do than "So, how was your day?" Here are 15 that work on a phone, sorted by whether you need to be online at the same time.

By Caspar BaumeisterUpdated 13 October 20266 min read

When you can't share a sofa, most of your relationship happens in a chat and on video calls. That works, but after a few months the calls start to sound the same. A game changes the format: you laugh, you compete a little, and you learn things you would never ask directly.

There is a good reason to keep doing it. In a diary study, Jiang and Hancock (2013) found that long distance couples shared more personal thoughts with each other than couples who lived close, and felt at least as intimate. Most games below are simply playful ways to share something personal.

All 15 games at a glance

Games for different time zones

These six don't need you to be online together. That makes them perfect for night shifts, different time zones or weeks when you can only talk for five minutes.

1. Guess my answer

One of you picks a question. Both answer it privately, then each guesses the other's answer before you reveal. Every correct guess is a point. The best questions are about you two, not trivia: "What did you think when you first saw me?" or "What would you miss most if we moved in together tomorrow?" Our how well do you know your partner quiz has 60 of them with answer options.

2. Who is more likely to

Send a card like "Who is more likely to fall asleep during our call?" Both answer with a name before reading the other's reply. Same name, one point. We collected 100 of them in our list of who is most likely to questions for couples.

3. Photo scavenger hunt

In the morning, send each other three prompts: something that reminds you of me, the view from where you are right now, something that made you smile. You have until the evening. It turns two separate days into a shared one, and the photos often start the best conversations.

4. Question of the day

One question per day, ideally at a fixed moment like your morning coffee. Take turns asking, and mix light and deep ones. If you need ideas, take them from our long distance relationship questions.

5. Song swap with a rule

Once a week, each of you adds three songs to a shared playlist, following a rule: songs that remind you of the beginning, songs for a road trip together, a song you would never admit to liking. Listen on the same day and talk about the picks.

6. Story chain

Write a story together, one or two sentences at a time, in a separate chat. The heroes could be two foxes who live far apart, or the two of you ten years from now. It is silly and slow, and somehow it ends up being sweet.

Games for video calls

These need both of you on a call at the same time. Plan them for the evenings when you actually have energy.

7. Draw it blind

One of you describes a simple picture without saying what it is ("a circle at the top, two triangles on it, a long line below"). The other one draws it. Then swap. Holding both drawings up to the camera is the best part.

8. Two truths and a wish

Tell three things about your week. Two are true, one is something you wish had happened. Your partner guesses the wish. You learn what they are longing for without having to ask.

9. Memory trivia

Quiz each other on your own story: Where was our first date? What did I wear? What did we eat on our first trip? Which song was playing in the car? Whoever remembers more picks the next movie.

10. Cook the same dish

Pick a recipe, shop separately, and cook at the same time with the phone leaning against the kitchen wall. Then eat "together" and rate each other's result honestly.

11. Watch party bingo

Watch the same movie in sync and make a bingo card for each other: "someone says trust me", "a dramatic slow motion scene", "you cry". The first full row wins.

12. Online board game night

Chess, word games and card games all exist in free browser versions you can play together. Keep a running score over months. It gives your calls a little ritual.

Games that plan your next visit

13. Bucket list match

Each of you writes down ten things you want to do together, privately. Then compare. The matches go on the list for your next visit. The rest are a nice look into what the other one dreams about.

14. Would you rather, visit edition

Would you rather spend the next weekend in a city or in a cabin? Cook together or try every restaurant? Each of you answers first, then guesses the other's pick. It is planning, disguised as a game.

15. Countdown challenges

Once the next visit is booked, give every remaining day a tiny task: send a voice message, share a childhood photo, describe the first thing you'll do when you see each other.

How to choose the right game

• Match the game to your energy. After a long day, a two minute question beats a one hour cooking challenge.
• Take turns choosing. If one of you always plans, it starts to feel like a job.
• Keep one asynchronous game running. With different time zones, it is what keeps you connected between calls.
• Don't turn every call into a game. Sometimes you just need to talk, or fall asleep on the call.
• Talk about the surprises. A wrong guess is the most interesting part. Ask why.